Who Am I

I am a product of my environment. Molded by expectations of those around me. A constantly changing being with opinions -constantly changing for the goals I am trying to meet and adapting to whatever situations I am faced with. Time, only adds to the many reasons why who I am has no definite definitions. My life is but a never ending journey of self development. Who I am today will not be who I am tomorrow as everyday brings new situations which question my identity. My morals, beliefs and opinions are not set in stone, so they too change as I do - they are what define me. I am a being that adapts to my environment, adjusts to meet expectations and changes with time.

I believe questioning who we are scares us. It challenges us to look "inwards", something we as a society are unfamiliar with. I believe we live in a world where we are fascinated by the lives of others, quick to judge and even quicker at placing blame. Not many are willing to see themselves; take in their own flaws and accept - therefore we cannot define our own identities. We are unwilling to go in dept with our thoughts as they may reveal something we are not prepared to accept. Personally I find that to be the case. In short, we put up a barrier to higher thinking as it may result in learning something about where we stand in life, compared to where we think we are.

the power of belief

We sat around, my friends and I, at the table in the back of the classroom - Science 10 if you cared to know. Drowning out the teachers mindless babble about some physics nonsense. This is how we spent every class - correction every class in which we didn't have a test; then we passed notes.

The class dragged on and we continued our breathless whispering of tales from French class. I always wondered why the teacher ignored our disobedience - probably because the bunch of us were still managing to get the highest marks in the class.
Well getting back to the point, we sat around exchanging stories (cough gossip) and then we spotted a beaker sitting on the counter behind us. One of the more obnoxious of our group stated that they could easily down the contents of the beaker. I, being the self absorbed teenager I am, couldn't possibly be out done. So doing the natural thing, I stuck my finger into the mystery substance and proceeded to lick it off my finger. Triumphantly I smiled at the group.

They stared at me in what I thought was mock horror. Until I noticed the beaker was labeled with some acid looking compound.

My heart dropped. My tongue began to burn immensely! I felt as if thousands of little paper cuts were being torn open in my mouth.
I was torn, tell the teacher of my idiotic move or not and continue with the pain. Before I could tell my obnoxious (even more so after this occurrence) friend confessed for me. The class erupted in laughter. My teacher got up and picked up the beaker.

There I was, dieing of describable pain and he was picking up the bloody beaker? He turned to me with that lopsided smile he was famous for. Turns out "dihydrogen monoxide", H20 or more commonly known as water isn't known for causing searing pain.
I thought I had been dieing...from drinking water.

This goes to show that belief is extremely powerful. The power of belief can cloud our judgment and take control of our sense. The mind is easily swayed into showing the results we believe should come. In my opinion, when facing any situation one should look outside one's own belief system. I think that this allows us to see clearly before deciding if any of our beliefs hold true in that situation.

examined vs. unexamined lives

Life can either be made priceless by leading an examined life, or made to be worthless by living an unexamined life.

An examined life is one where one's actions are based upon ideas, morals and beliefs that have been solidified with one's own experiences or reasoning. These found ideas, morals and beliefs may or may not agree with the set standards of society. An examined life is one where positive change is initiated due to looking at one's life in retrospect - ultimately finding enlightenment, according to Socrates. In my opinion, life cannot ever be fully examined as a new positive change only generates a new "life" to examine and so on. Therefore I believe an examined life is a dynamic, forever changing life; may result in changes or further fossilization to one's morals. I also believe that a person's beliefs/life changes with time. This would mean that life could truly never fully be examined, meaning there is no end point to enlightenment because a conclusion can never be drawn from a constantly changing life - time would only bring more and more things to examine, more knowledge if you will.

An unexamined life holds everything a person living an enlightened/examined life would not want. Basically an unexamined life is governed by societies beliefs and normality - not solidified by the persons own knowledge or experiences. "Stuck in the box" is a good way to describe it. Many may even be afraid of looking at how they live their lives because it forces one to question the morals they've acquired, possibly even have to change them. One living an unexamined life, an unenlightened life only follows what has been set out for them, never questioning or testing it. This life as Socrates says becomes a "worthless" existence, as none of your morals are your own. It becomes just living, while an examined life would be living with purpose and meaning.

I feel that one should work towards living an examined life, though a fully enlightened life is unattainable. Doing so sounds redundant, but I believe living an enlightened life is about taking the time to ask questions and learn why you feel how you do. It is not about attaining a final knowledge. The beauty is that the journey is the positive change - a constantly changing life, as the path of examined life has no end. Getting to such a point, obviously takes time, but I see it as time well spent. I mean is your life not worth your time? - Worth making priceless?

get your daily dose of pabulum

I'm feeling extremely flouvorless lately - not that ful

imponderable

well ,
So as you know my usb is still mia [ secretly don't know what mia is, but hey you don't need to know that ]. I've gotten exactly 2 creepy emails to post pictures of myself so, today is YOUR lucky day - naaaat -.
But here are a few of my favourite random things...
Yes, I paint - not often -. If you look to your right *insert air plane flight attendant like hand motions*, you'll see the magical world inside my head! Yes, that tis the "Parveen get away from studying world" ... inside my head. Demented? Just maybe.
And moving along...
If you look to your left, I'll spare you the corny hand motions, you'll see a monk! As defined by the ... dictionary.com as "a man who has withdrawn from the world for religious reasons, esp. as a member of an order of cenobites living according to a particular rule and under vows of poverty, chastity, and obedience." ... In case you were wondering. He was cool, I have many stalker like shots of him - stay tuned! -... I'm joking, seriously I'm only joking. But hey there you go - I've managed to add photos without my usb - yaay me? London Tipton is my idol... really now? - Yush -

hey chem and physics inspires

- linkin park = in the end... parveen-a-fied? -
It starts with ten millions things
I don't know why
It doesn't even matter how hard you try keep it all in mind
Why'd IUPAC design this?
To explain would kill me
All I know
Methyl is an important thing
Watch the pencil fly across the paper
Watch it write till there's no room
The mistakes begin to pill up
It's so re-tarddedd
Didn't look at my mark
Watch my mind go right out the window
Trying to make sense, but i just don't know
Wasted all my rubber, just to realize
It made sense in my head and even though I tried, I just fell apart
Hopefully this will all be a bad dream in the end

I studied so hard
And got no where
But in an hour
I was already on Facebook.
Why'd I have to fail
Only to fail on the retest
But at the end
I couldn't scrape an A

Ten million rules, I can't understand why
It doesn't even matter how hard you try keep it all in mind
Ms.Joyce designed this worksheet, to make it all clear
I actually tried!
In spite of way Mehtab and Sasha mocked me.
Acting like I wasn't part of Mehtab's life
Sasha, remembering all the times we fight
I'm surprised class is over--errr
I wish things were the way they were before
Now I can't even recognize numbers anymore
Not like I got them back then
But this will never make sense
It made sense in my head, and even though I tried, I just got scared
Hopefully this will all be a bad dream in the end

[Chorus]

I've left it all up to my calculator
Pushed so many buttons
And all to get an A
There's only one chapter left to know

[Chorus]